Octoberisms

It's been a month of ups and downs. October is that time of year when the leaves start changing colors, it gets colder and rainier and more vibrant. You feel things a little more. I've been introspective, speaking my thoughts a little more, and at the same time keeping more inside.

A friend of mine and I were talking about our dating/relationship histories. He was talking about his cocaine/crack girl, the one that you can't seem to break the habit for because of one reason or another. The ex that makes you drop everything and do silly things despite real world logic. He's got one. We know another friend has one, and I've got one too. Can you be addicted to a person or people? I see it too often I think. Usually a connection where some random thing went amiss but the connection previously caused something akin to a drug-induced blissful state.

My recent network of friends is a web of confusion. Someone tried to draw it once on a napkin late at night and it was pretty funny. Full of direct and indirect arrows of connection, dotted lines, wishful thinking, and recursive arrows.